People May Think I’m Fine…
…but really I am about to go off the deep end. Maybe it’s my own fault for being too happy at times, but don’t get it twisted, having a baby and working part time (overnight) is quickly wearing me down. When people visit me, I look great, my baby is happy, my house is clean, and there’s food in my fridge. But all this comes at a price.
By 9 o’clock I’m virtually dead. It doesn’t stop there though. After that, I go to my overnight job, in a high pressure environment, and force myself to be a coherent human being until 9am. I might do some grocery shopping after work before I head home, where “My Sweet” is waiting for me and wondering where his noob (nipple/boob) is and why the hell he had to drink from that plastic peace of hell. “Mommy’s here,” I say while he’s nuzzling into my sternum looking for the gold. To nurse him without taking a shower is just plain wrong, so I take a quick 4 minute unrelaxing shower before crashing to sleep while nursing my baby. I feel like the mother hog with my little piglet going for broke.
When my sleep deprivation finally catches up to me, heads will roll. I’m talking major B**ch Fit. I have one at least twice a month.
I know it can’t go on like this though. I don’t want to wind up like Kate Goslin.*
Kate Goslin of John & Kate plus 8 is now a single mother. People accuse her of driving her husband away by constantly nagging and belittling him. For the record, John Goslin is the poster boy for Douche bags.
September 4th, 2009 at 12:01 am
I understand how you feel! The only exception? My house isn’t spic and span, I’m in a t-shirt and jeans with my hair in a ponytail. Baby is clean, hair freshly done, happy and well cared for, dinner is cooked and on the table waiting for hubby. But boy oh boy when sleep deprivation hits, IT HITS!
September 4th, 2009 at 6:46 am
Thanks Tina,
I knew there had to be more people like me. I read so many stories about how the house falls apart after the baby comes that I was determined not to let that happen to me. I’m realizing that having things out of place does not mean I’m losing control. I think it just means that the baby comes first.
September 20th, 2009 at 8:17 pm
Honey, it is not just like that with a new baby. I have four and sometimes I am so tired that I can’t think straight. Of course your child will come first before getting your house in order, but that all a part of raising children. You are not losing control. You might be trying to do a lot a one time. Just pace yourself and try to relax a little.
September 22nd, 2009 at 9:17 am
Four! Yeah, you have to pace yourself. I want 2 more myself and if I burn out now, I can forget about having 2 more later. My hubby always says, “…and you want more!” I feel like I have to show him that I can handle Drew before I can have more children with him. What is this?